in my life...

in my almost fifty five years of life,i have not been a total angel...i am basically very nice,but folks,i have had days,and years,in which i have been something less than angelic... in fact,i know some people who simply do not like me at all... to those people,i say that i really do not care a whit about what you believe about me... i learned a very long time that you can not please everybody,and i refuse to try to please those people who knock me down,and i also refuse to take any guff from people who dislike me,because those people are not worth my time... i spent close to a decade "on the road",and that time really taught me a great deal about life and people... most of that time,i had a meanness to me that i had to use to really survive "on the road",and walking and traveling this country gave me a ten year tan,because i was outside so often,but honestly i refused to buckle under to the aching need of being no one... i was a true survivor,and the main reason that i traveled so often that i really did not want to became a mental vegetable,by staying in one place for too long,because i knew down deep that i had too much on the "ball",to be a real piece of mental trash... i did some things that i truly regret,because i did hurt some people,but i wanted to really survive,so i was sometimes a real jerk,to put it mildly... i survived because i had to,and i did not care what i had to do to survive... i still do some of the things that i really learned "on the road",but i try very,very hard not to hurt people,so i smile a little more than i used to,folks,but,need be,i will be someone who you may not like too much,and honestly i really do not care a whit about it... i am a true survivor,so be it!!!!!!!