stories of my life...

folks,i actually almost got married once... how close,you may ask??? that is a very good question to answer... well,the first time i asked my soulmate to marry me,i was so drunk that i fell asleep on her carpet... it was about a month after i met her,in 1986... you had to see me that crazy night to believe what happened,because i was in love with her basically from the first week that i met her... i basically knew that i was the one for her,because i was not one for fighting a woman,and she was actually very shy,but skittish,after a rather nasty divorce that was in the final stages of basic hell for her,when i met her... actually nothing intimate happened between us for months,because i honestly knew that she had been through a hellish divorce,with many a broken bone,and other things that happened to her... the first time,in October,1986,that i knew that i was the one for her happened in her old apartment,when a neighbor stopped by her apartment,sat down on her couch,and waited most of the day,for everyone to leave,and her kids to go to bed... well,i was not going to put up with that crap... i was invited,not that scum,to visit her... well,knowing what my soulmate had been through,i saw her eyes widen,and her knuckles go white,and her wheelchair scoot backwards toward a wall... i asked the scum to leave,and he refused,saying that he was there to visit her... i said that i was invited,not him,to visit her,and he again refused to leave,so i opened the door,and told him to leave... after some more arguing,he did,and as he left,i told him,if he came back,mentioned her name,or even looked at her,i would make him a pile of walking manure(i have to soften what i said to him,because it was obscene,in detail)... i then walked over to her,got behind her in her wheelchair,simply hugged her,and told her softly,"i love you"... the next time that i asked her to marry me was on my 33rd birthday,when i was on the phone,long distance,from St. George,Utah,and she said yes... well,because of many misadventures,and both of us being stupid at times,it never happened... it was supposed to happen in May,1993,in Las Vegas,but i got shafted out of a month's payment by Social Security(found out the day before leaving for Las Vegas,on the 30th of April,1993),and it absolutely broke her heart,she blamed me,and tossed me out,again,of the apartment... actually,she never got over that... well,through many tough things,arguments(legendary,i may add),her illnesses that caused her to be in a hospital bed,and four major surgeries,in almost six years,we struggled through many crappy years that caused us a lot of years of pain... well,she wrote me a letter to tell me that she was in a local hospital,she had stage four of a very rare cancer,and she had months to live... i lived on the bus line that directly went to the hospital that she was in.... so,i showed up in the lobby of the hospital,ask for her room,then i see a lady in a wheelchair out of the corner of my eye,did a double take,realize that it was my soulmate,then i just walk over to her,and grab her hand... she was in tears,saying,"i do not believe it",as i walked over... i then spent 16-18 hours a day with her for the last fifty four days of her life,even spending six nights with her in the bed next to her... well,we finally made plans to get married on New Year's Eve,1999... we talked everything out,and we were madly in love,like in the beginning... unfortunately,things were not a fairy tale,as she died on Christmas Day,1999,six days before we were supposed to get married... we had a private ceremony(just the two of us),and said what we had been wanting to say to each other,for thirteen plus years,and then she was incoherent the next day,and died on Christmas Day... that still breaks my heart,folks...